Rachel Hartwick

The seventh episode of The Bachelorette features a steamy date that goes all the way with Nick Viall, and front-runner Shawn considers leaving the show because of  jealousy over a group date rose.

Well, it’s the episode we’ve all been waiting for.

Last week’s episode ended with Ian calling out Kaitlyn for being “surface-level” and “shallow.” This episode opens with him telling Kaitlyn about how he wanted to meet the girl who was heartbroken over Chris Soules, not the one who wanted her “field plowed.”

He leaves, and both have sour feelings about the other. In his interview during the limo ride home, he sighs with relief and talks about how he is so excited to finally be out of there and be able to have a deep conversation again that’s not about sex. He just can’t wait to get back to all the girls he has at home to have these conversations with. However, he adds that damn, he “needs to have some sex.” What????

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He goes on to talk about how great of a Bachelor he could be. Clearly the only person who wants Ian to be the Bachelor is Ian.

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— Dana Weiss (@Possessionista) June 23, 2015

Thought Juan Pablo was the most disliked Bachelor? This marks the third guy to leave the show this season on his own volition. If we look solely at who has left by choice, Kaitlyn’s record is worse than Pablo’s. Brady left the show for Britt. Kupah practically asked for it. Drunk Ryan M obviously didn’t have any intentions on staying longer than a night. Tony left by choice, and now Ian’s bags are packed. But I’m not surprised — considering this show started with two Bachelorettes and the guys had to choose, I figured that more guys would choose to leave out of frustration than in past seasons.

While Kaitlyn fumes over Ian’s inconsiderate comments, Nick Viall is the first one to get to talk to her and calm her down. His naturally chill personality must be comforting, but he does have the benefit of being the first person to talk to Kaitlyn after she was stung by Ian’s words. Anyone would look awesome in comparison to Ian at this point, but Nick especially really knows how to cheer Kaitlyn up.

They talk for more than 20 minutes, so other guys are fed up that they don’t get to see her — Shawn especially. Remember how obsessed Joshua was with hating Nick last episode? This episode, Shawn is almost as bad. He storms upstairs to interrupt the two so he can talk to Kaitlyn and catches them making out. Not good for his jealousy issues.

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The rose ceremony
The rose ceremony is held at the Alamo, and big-lipped Justin (who we don’t really know) and jealous Nick-hating bad-haircut Joshua are eliminated. Not one part of me is going to miss Joshua or his haircut.

In his interview before he heads home, Joshua says “Damnit, I’m really not pleased that I’m leaving and Nick is still around. That bothers me.” Face it Joshua, Nick just has more game than you.

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Host Chris Harrison then announces to Kaitlyn and the remaining guys that they’re all heading to Dublin, Ireland. Yay! From the cute pubs to the cathedrals, Dublin is a perfect place for some hopefully normal romantic dates.

Once they arrive, Kaitlyn greets the guys and immediately steals Nick away for the first one-on-one date. The guys aren’t happy, obviously (cough, Shawn, cough), but their date is pretty romantic. They spend the day walking around the city, buying souvenirs and checking out the pubs. It may be a mixture of their past connection, a whiskey buzz and the romance of Dublin, but things start to get pretty steamy.

Even after they change outfits and head to “dinner” they can’t keep their hands — or lips— off of each other. In other words, they don’t even touch their food and make out the whole time.

Kaitlyn tells him that she doesn’t want the date to end and asks him if he wants to come back to her hotel room with her. Nick doesn’t believe her at first. He’s ecstatic.

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At this point, there’s no stopping them. They’re making out all over the city, Kaitlyn is straddling him in public. It’s a hot mess. Once they arrive, they sit on her hotel room couch for a few minutes and kiss, then Kaitlyn just smiles at the cameras and the two shut the door to their room together. For whatever reason, the producers insisted that they have their mics on in the room, because we literally hear Kaitlyn moaning in the room for a good five minutes.  

So… the cameras guys just stay in there listening? Uh…

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The next morning, Kaitlyn stands on her balcony stressing out, telling the crew that she just hopes Nick doesn’t tell the guys. They jump cut to Nick, who doesn’t tell, but lies to the guys that all they did was sit on her couch, which is obviously going to cause issues later on.

Now before you start formulating your own opinions about Kaitlyn, let’s be clear: Do not start slut shaming Kaitlyn. If this was unfilmed and a “real life” situation, there wouldn’t be anything atypical about the fact that she’s sleeping with Nick right now. After all, they’ve “talked” for months in the past, gotten to know each other very well, and just went on an all-day steamy date in freaking Ireland. Both of them are clearly extremely lustful of each other, and if they want to take their relationship to that level, that’s their choice, and probably what most people in that situation would do.

The problem is that this isn’t “real life.” They’re on national TV, and Kaitlyn is still technically dating seven other guys. There’s a reason that no one has, as far as we know, gone all the way with a contestant prior to the fantasy suite in Bachelor/Bachelorette history. Sex complicates things far more than just kissing does because it opens a whole new door to emotions and issues.

Sure, going months without it is probably difficult for all the contestants, which Ian reminded us with his double-standard ideologies, but the root of the issue here is simply hurting the other contestants’ feelings.

It wouldn’t have been fair no matter who Kaitlyn did it with, but I have to say, it’s almost worse that it was Nick. Nick didn’t fail to make public the fact that he did it with last season’s Andi Dorfman in the fantasy suite, and his advantage of having “talked” with Kaitlyn prior to her becoming the Bachelorette makes us wonder why Kaitlyn even took up the offer of being the Bachelorette in the first place, considering she was THIS interested in Nick.

Group Date
Kaitlyn puts this issue behind her for now, and attempts to enjoy a group date with the other guys. This might be the “best” group date by far — they literally pretend Kaitlyn is dead and put her in a casket. The guys have to write eulogies for her.

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Cute, right? I just want to know which producer was like, “Let’s put her in this casket and have the guys all write eulogies for her.” Of all the things you could do in Dublin.

Despite the strangeness of the date, the guys have fun with it. Kaitlyn plays a pretty terrible dead person because she’s just laughing at them the whole time. But the last person to share his eulogy is big teddy bear Ben Z (remember his mom passed away when he was younger). Suddenly, this date isn’t so funny anymore. Ben asks the guys to leave the room when he gives his heartfelt eulogy to Kaitlyn. It’s sweet, but reminds us how messed up the date is. Luckily, a couple old guys with banjos come out of nowhere and play them some songs to lighten up the mood again.

The group then heads to hang out in the Guinness Storehouse. Kaitlyn gives the group date rose to Jared, which means the two get to hang out together longer and enjoy a private concert together. Jared is so cute, and the fact that he looks like pointier-faced Adam Scott must be part of why I like him so much.

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Now get ready for some unexpected drama: for whatever reason, Jared getting the group date rose sets Shawn OFF. He’s so angry that he leaves the guys to go talk to some man (who we’re assuming is a producer, but no one’s really sure). He reveals to him that off-camera, Kaitlyn had told Shawn he was, no doubt, “the one.” And he keeps saying “I love this girl,” even though he hasn’t even told Kaitlyn yet — at least on camera. He whines about how he “can’t handle this” and doesn’t want her to “bang two other dudes” when fantasy suite time rolls around. Keep in mind Shawn has no idea about Nick yet — he’s set off because Jared got a ROSE.

According to the previews for next week’s episode, Kaitlyn admits to her and Nick’s hotel room actions in front of ALL the guys. We’ll see if Shawn can handle sticking around.

The Bachelorette airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on ABC.

@rachel_hartwick

rh375113@ohio.edu

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