Hello, my name is Mark, and I am addicted to fantasy sports.
(Hi, Mark.)
Last year, I hit the pages of The Post to talk smack about fantasy sports and the people that participate in fantasy leagues. I labeled these people as fools because they wasted hours upon hours reading injury reports, sifting through stats and even turning on their favorite pro teams for fantasy glory.
I made a terrible mistake.
A year later I am cheering for the players on my fantasy roster to score points in any possible way like a lowlife who needs his team to cover the spread because if not, the mafia's coming to break his thumbs.
Chances are if you have been to a party anytime recently, I was that guy sitting alone, hands clenched together screaming at Brett Favre to throw to Donald Driver - for double the points, of course - and cursing in ways that would make my mother smack me when receivers did not magically pull in balls thrown five feet above their heads.
If only Antwaan Randle El was as tall as a two-story house, I would have had six more points!
Such actions truly did not strike me as odd or alarming until I realized, for the third straight weekend before action on Sunday, I was reciting my roster changes and reasoning for playing Drew Bledsoe instead of Tom Brady to my girlfriend on the phone.
A few awkward moments of silence later followed by a, Wow ... that's ... cool
and it hit me: I have a problem.
Despite the sporadic and unintentional intervention, my lust for all things statistical - from Tiki Barber's shoe size to who washed Santana Moss' socks this week - is only growing. Whereas last year I would have played myself off as geeky for being able to recite Jeremy's Shockey's stats and favorite color, this year I pride myself on such knowledge.
Is there an end in sight to my madness? Hardly! My friends have told me time and time again that - as a fantasy rookie willing to drop in $20 - my popularity could not be higher.
So let's run the list: walking stat master, check. Suave and in with the ladies, check. Mr. Popular with all your friends - who happen to be in their fifth fantasy season - check. Out $20 I do not have a prayer of seeing again, check.
And to think that a year ago I had none of this!
Hello, my name is Mark, and I am addicted to fantasy sports.
- Mark Shugar is a junior journalism major and sports editor for The Post. He currently is on step five and on his way to full rehabilitation. Letters of encouragement and your personal struggles with fantasy sports can be sent to ms314803@ohiou.edu. 17
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