When I think back to my first weekend as an Ohio University freshman, what I remember most clearly are my expectations. Upon arrival, I expected new best friends, a new boyfriend, a 4.0 grade point average and a lot of drunken nights. Sitting here two years later I have amazing best friends, good grades and a fridge full of Nati Light. (I'm now accepting applications for exemplary boyfriends).
The point is I didn't become a wise and experienced collegian overnight. Freshmen: please take note. Although you may have been at the top of the food chain in high school, you are now at the bottom. An insect G? specifically an ant, if you prefer.
Now don't feel bad, we've all been there. And upperclassmen are not anteaters set out to eat you, but more like gorillas G? or I suppose bobcats would be more appropriate. Stay out of their way and you won't get hurt.
Now that you've had enough of my worldly animal analogies, it's time for the big question. What will you do this weekend?
I will not provide you with house addresses of parties, and I will not tell you which bars you can and cannot get into. I will, however, give you a few pieces of advice that will make your journey to upperclassmen-living smoother and less troublesome.
1. Do not roam campus (and beyond) in groups of 20. If spotted, you will become an immediate target and may find yourself harassed in any number of cruel ways (i.e. vulgar language, foreign objects thrown in your direction, etc.)
2. If you happen to stumble upon a party, take the opportunity to find out whether you are actually welcome to come inside and drink the provided alcohol. Again, if you choose not to take this advice, you may find yourself up against some form of embarrassing consequence.
3. Once you have established that you have been invited to said party, do not take six shots and bong three beers within the first 20 minutes. Especially if the only intoxication you have ever experienced was when you took an extra-large gulp of your cousin's margarita at a family function. Take it slow, my friend.
If you have read this, you are one step ahead of many sad and unknowing freshmen who undoubtedly will cause embarrassing situations for themselves this weekend. Just remember, if you find yourself disappointed with this first, wild weekend in Athens, there's always next weekend G? and four more years after that.
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Natalie Cammarata
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