Valentine’s Day is next week, and people are busy writing heartfelt letters, buying flowers and planning special dinner dates. While historians still dispute the origins of the holiday, the modern and commercialized version of Valentine’s Day dominating American culture began in the 1840s. Valentine’s Day is meant to celebrate love, whether that be with a romantic partner, friends or family.
Still, people hate Valentine’s Day, claiming it fuels loneliness, relationship pressure and consumerism. 58% of Americans say they don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day or consider it a “real holiday,” ranking it below nearly every other major holiday celebrated in the U.S.
To those people, I say: grow up.
Valentine’s Day has transformed in recent years, with Gen Z leading the “cultural shift” to make the holiday “more inclusive.” Valentine’s Day is what you make of it and those who loudly hate it are trying too hard to seek out negativity.
The holiday is often criticized for its materialist culture, where spending money is “proof of love.” For many who celebrate, the pressure to match their partner’s gifting or spending expectations turns it into a “relationship performance review,” which can be particularly difficult for those navigating financial stress.
Gift giving may be a love language for many, but it’s not a requirement and it shouldn’t involve excessive spending. Healthy relationships can form with communication and discussing expectations, something critics of the holiday seem unwilling to do.
If money or elaborate gifts are the issue, communicate. Being honest about what you can afford or have time for is the way to avoid this “societal pressure” many complain about. If you and your partner love each other, you’ll find ways to celebrate the holiday within your budget and schedule.
The other love languages are “words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time and physical touch.” Showing your appreciation can be as simple as a handwritten note or cooking dinner at home together. It’s important to communicate and tell your partner what’s realistic for you. If your partner can’t respect those requests, Valentine’s Day isn’t your only problem.
Many people also hate Valentine’s Day because they’re single, but the holiday is about love and appreciation, which isn’t confined to romantic love.
Ava Kincaid, a freshman studying early childhood education, says she loves Valentine’s Day and is going home to celebrate it with friends this year.
“If you’re single, there’s still people who love you, and you can still celebrate it,” Kincaid said. Self-care nights, rom-com movie nights and other non-traditional Valentine’s Day celebrations are popular among college kids.
New trends have emerged to appreciate other types of love, like “Galentine’s Day,” a day for women to appreciate platonic love with their female friends. The term “Galentine's Day” originated from a 2010 episode of the hit sitcom “Parks and Recreation,” where Amy Poehler says every Feb. 13, she and her friends, “leave our husbands and our boyfriends at home, and we just come and kick it, breakfast-style. Ladies celebrating ladies.”
The women-centric holiday quickly exploded on social media, and many still use the day to appreciate their friends and platonic love with a nice dinner or movie night 16 years later.
You can even celebrate “anti-Valentine’s Day,” where there are no rules. You can do self-care, or if the commercialization of the holiday upsets you, you can reject it by “supporting local businesses or donating to a cause.” The holiday is absolutely what you make it – there’s no reason to hate it loudly.
College kids also find ways to celebrate the day, even if relationships are complicated or loved ones are far away.
Ohio University offers Valentine’s Day events, such as making sustainable Valentine’s Day cards with the Office of Sustainability. At Nelson Court, there’s also Valentine’s card making with well-being coaches or chocolate fondue and yogurt parfaits.
Gratitude, or appreciating the good things in life, is a fierce yet simple force that creates “profound positive changes in mood, resilience, and overall well-being.” Appreciating loved ones in simple or unconventional ways on Valentine’s Day does good for yourself and others, and it doesn’t have to include expensive gifts or extreme proclamations of love. Find something you love and appreciate it– it's that simple. Love in all forms is worth celebrating.
Abby Shriver is a freshman studying journalism at Ohio University. Please note the opinions expressed in this column do not represent those of The Post. Want to talk to Abby about their column? Email/message them at as064024@ohio.edu / @abbyshriver_
