Chivalry is not dead. In fact, opening the car door is still deemed as courteous as it was in the 1950s. Picking up the dinner tab is much appreciated, and being well-mannered on a first date will always be seen as admirable.
There should, however, be one difference between current dating expectations and the courting that took place nearly 55 years ago. Chivalry shouldn't be considered the gentlemanly thing to do any longer.
Now before you start blaming me because your boyfriend won't shell out enough pocket change for your side salad, give the idea of shared chivalry a shot. The concept is not nearly as painful as it sounds.
Perhaps you've seen the movie How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days. In the film, Kate Hudson's character, Andie Anderson, demands everything under the sun from her male love interest. I'll guarantee that a quick way to lose a guy is by commanding too much from him.
Men, you should realize that not all women actually want you to pay for them and pamper them. It's just that we've been brought up believing that men do the chivalrous acts, and we sit back, smile and act appreciative. It's time to quickly forget that notion.
There is nothing wrong with a man treating a woman to a fabulous night out on the town. However, there is a problem when it becomes wholly the responsibility of a male to ensure relationship romance. It's 2004, and the time has finally come to cut men some slack. This doesn't mean you have to lower your expectations of the opposite sex. It simply means that you should expect more from yourself.
Stephen's and Seven Sauces can get a little expensive for college students who struggle with the thought of paying more than 20 cents for a package of Ramen noodles. Movies can get costly, especially for girls dying to see Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason and every other movie sequel this holiday season.
Next time, ladies, offer to pay half or even the entire bill. Sharing the costs shows your significant other that you're in an equal partnership. In this way, you will never feel like you owe your man anything, even if it's 99 cents for Wendy's french fries.
Paying for food is one thing, but there are plenty of other ways to level the playing field in this dating game. Women are allowed to join the army and work at construction sites.
The last time I checked, females were capable of fixing a flat tire and barbecuing on the grill. We are even bright enough to change a light bulb on our own. If ladies can do this type of dirty work, then we can certainly hold the door open for ourselves and others. Plus, men welcome the polite gesture just as much as we do.
Of course, they aren't going to come out and say it. So, as the saying goes, ladies first. Be first and offer to split the cost of lunch without him asking. Make the dinner reservations before he even has a chance to. Be the first to say that you'll pick him up instead of having him drive every night. It will be unexpected but greatly appreciated.
Initiative is necessary for getting anywhere in this world. Besides, there's absolutely nothing wrong with grabbing hold of the wheel and making him sit in the passenger seat. If women treat men as equals, we will be more likely to receive equal treatment ourselves.
-Mara McCormick is a junior advertising major. Send her an e-mail at mara.mccormick@ohiou.edu.
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Mara McCormick
