The Homecoming parade brought a lot of fun last weekend.
The International Student Union showed up as the first unit of the parade and attracted the crowd by showing off various national flags from all over the world. The organization gathered Bobcats from all over the world and I heard people discussing the large population of international Bobcats.
As one of the international students at OU, I deeply feel the barriers between the domestic and international students, including tradition, language and ways of thinking. Based on my personal experiences observing communication between international and American students, I have noticed both groups act one of three ways with the other group. Their interactions can be described as either parallel, intersectional or coincidental.
American students who act "parallel" have no idea how to communicate with people in a different group. For the domestic students, some of them grow up with little interactions with foreign cultures, even though they maybe learn about other cultures from the book or the news. Still, they feel uncomfortable with starting a conversation with the real people.
For international students, when they break in a new culture, they have the tendency to interact with people who have similar or common background with them. They interact easier with people from the same country or same area and it is easy to think of conversation topics. People in the parallel relationship always get along well with the people in their own group, but no one else.
"Intersectional" people help create the major relationships around us. People want and try to learn about people from different cultures. However, there are some limitation, like language and culture varieties that prevent the creation of closer relationships.
In my opinion, language is the biggest problem for international students. Lack of vocabulary can directly influence the conversation content and the motivation of acquaintances. People cannot have intensive conversations with language barriers. That is the big reason why domestic and international students have such a hard time forming friendships.
"Coincidental" relationships between American and international students mean that people with different background are able to form an intimate, interdependent relationship. Both students are able to find a balanced way to adjust the culture of each other. However, coincidental relationships always take time and, in most cases, it requires the international student to chose to adjust to domestic culture.
All parallel, intersection and coincidence relationships all have their advantages and disadvantages. People always choose the relationship that most fit their personalities.
Here are some useful communication tips for both American students and international students if they want to learn more about each other:
First, using nonverbal language is very important. Even a smile can say a thousand words. Trust me, as a global positive symbol, the benefits of a smile can bring much more than you imagine. Smiling and having a confident posture will help you show off your kindness and acceptance.
Second, try to ask if people know the meaning of the keywords in your stories. For example, when you tell a story about a waitress working in the restaurant, please make sure your international friends know what “tray” and “medium-well" mean. Similarly, when talking about the life in your home country, international students should better to explain special food and customs as background to the story.
Last, if you have opportunity, please try studying abroad. You will feel totally differently as a domestic citizen and a foreigner. At the same time, you will open up your eyes to the world and you will also learn how to adjust to new cultures and also how to help others adjust.
Xinyi Yan is a senior studying strategic communication at Ohio University. What is the easiest way to make friends? Let Xinyi know by emailing her at xy307715@ohio.edu.
