“It’s not quite a priority,” officials said. “But we might take a look at what’s going on.”
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Donald Trump has recently released his in-depth plan to burn down the White House and “destroy the Obama administration from the inside,” as he announced this past Saturday at a rally in the capital.
“It’s all very carefully configured,” Donald Trump told his supporters. “We’re just going to burn the entire White House down. It’s about time someone’s done something about it. And you know, I love Washington, D.C., but it’s really about time someone fixes that place up. We’ve got to rebuild it from the ground up, and we’ve got to start now.”
Not to the surprise of many, officials have ignored Trump’s violent rhetoric encouraging and planning illegal and morally bankrupt actions.
“It’s fine,” an official told reporters. “We might consider looking into it. It’s not quite a priority, but we might take a look at what’s going on.”
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“Look, it’s just arson, and it’s just the White House,” Cathy L. Lanier, the chief of police at the Metropolitan Police Department, said in a recent interview. “Not a big deal. He’s just saying stuff. He’s only encouraging violence and planning it, not actually doing it, so it doesn’t matter. We might consider investigating it, but we know the FBI is busy with Clinton’s emails, and those are a lot more important right now than some stupid plan about burning down the capital.”
After being asked if they were worried about Trump’s dangerous rhetoric, his supporters responded like so:
“Nah, I’m not worried,” Trump supporter Danny Smith said. “I’ve been wantin’ to burn that place down myself for years. Glad someone’s got the guts to not be all politically correct about it and speak up.”
“Trump knows what he’s doing,” Trump supporter Linda Thompson said. “He’s a businessman. I’m tired of all these politicians we’re getting from Washington. Why not get the best of both worlds? Someone who’s not a politician as president, and we get to burn down the capital. Sounds like true American patriotism to me.”
In fact, after Trump announced those plans, he experienced another jump in the polls among his competitors, Ted Cruz and John Kasich.
“It’s probably good for the economy, anyway,” Trump supporter Bob Johnson said. “Burn down the White House, and who’s there to regulate all them taxes and prices? Nobody. The economy’s fixed like that. That’s the power of the free market, baby.”
Marco Omta is a freshman studying music production. What do you think about Trump's violent rhetoric? Email Marco at mo183714@ohio.edu.
