Many embarrassing incidents can arise during a sexual encounter. For example, farting during oral sex. Let's face it, our bodies are weird, and when naked, they do weird things.
By far the most embarrassing experience, however, is being caught or catching someone in the act. No matter where you are - at home, in the dorms, in an off-campus apartment or house - when you live with someone else, there is a high potential for this awkward discovery.
Once you've been had, you've got a messy situation on your hands that you need to clean up. Performing damage control after being caught or catching someone is a necessary evil.
When living with another person, not only do you have to decide who's going to do the dishes and who's going to vacuum, you have to devise a system to avoid walking in on each other during your most intimate moments. If you have your own room, you need to make certain you always lock your door. But if you live in the dorms, you should come up with a symbol that says to your roommate, Hey
I'm gettin' laid. When we lived in the residence halls and needed privacy, we drew stars on the dry erase boards that hung on our doors. That symbol alerted our roommates to stay away. Just as it is crucial to use protection, it is crucial to spend 10 seconds utilizing the symbol, whatever it may be.
If you forget your symbol and your roommate walks in on you, you are the one in the wrong. You need to stop what you're doing, clean up and suffer blue balls for one afternoon. Apologize immediately, and never forget your symbol again. If you had the unfortunate experience of opening the door, you have the right to rib your roommate for at least one week. But, stay cool about it. It may happen to you one day.
If you ignore a sexual symbol on your door and walk in anyway, you are the worst roommate EVER. Not only did you interrupt your roommate's booty session, you just saw their partner butt naked, which will piss them off even more. Don't just stand there for a free show; turn around and leave, apologizing on your way out.
Getting caught by your parents is definitely worse than by a roommate. Not only do they feel the shock of seeing their precious child naked in the throes of passion, they have to immediately come to terms with the fact that you're not their little angel anymore. You have to deal with the fact that your parents know beyond a doubt that you're getting nookie. Either way, damage control is more important in this situation.
Be prepared for them to fly off the handle. Remember that this is harder for them than it is for you. You may be the one who's naked, but they're the ones who feel exposed. We suggest putting on your clothes and leaving your house for a while so they can simmer. Upon your return, be prepared to have to sit through long, awkward conversations and probing questions. Be honest. Assure them that you're using protection, apologize and promise never to have sex on the living room rug again.
While the situations we've described are awful, the worst is being caught red-handed when you're by yourself. When you're caught with another person, at least you're not the only one naked in the room. When you're by yourself, all you have is you and your roommate - staring at each other - with your genitals in hand. In any case, no apologies are needed. This is a time you say to each other, Let's pretend this didn't happen and go on your merry way. No one should make mention of it again.
The overriding point of all this is to stay calm and maintain a sense of coolness about it. It sucks for everyone involved, but if you stay mature, you can handle the incident well. Just try to remember to lock your door.
Katie and Katie have deadbolt locks and electric fences on their doors. Send them an e-mail at twototango@excite.com.
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Katie Gill and Katie Goggin
