Humans have undergone millions of years of evolution, but nothing takes us one step back toward the zoo like a trip to the movies.
In the spirit of unbridled optimism, however, I'm assuming some slips in movie etiquette occur because people don't know the rules. So here are a few ins and outs of movie etiquette and some lesser-known tips. (The obvious ones ' such as not answering a cell phone or bringing small children to a showing of The Departed ' are absent here because I believe in a world where those go without saying.)
Seat Check ' The first step in the fine art of seating is to extend some common decency. Leave two seats between yourself and the next couple and wait to make the coat seat until after the movie begins.
And now it's war: He who arrives first wins. Climbing over people at the end of an aisle is annoying, but they were wise enough to arrive early. They have no duty to budge an inch ' certainly not if you show up late ' unless an usher comes in and asks the audience to do the dreaded shift to the middle.
The ultimate judgment call on moving involves the precious factor. If you can't stand the sight of a little boy with watery blue eyes, Velcro shoes and rickets sitting away from his father, be the better person. If you can sleep on that, stay put.
Coming Soon ' Unlike most of the audience, if you arrived early enough to see all the coming attractions, it's your right to chatter politely. The coming attractions also are the brief buffer zone for the shh
so wait until the movie begins before you decide if someone merits it.
Ill call u l8r ' The bright LCD screen is giving the ringing cell phone a run for its money as the cardinal sin of moviegoing. Text messages don't make noise, but the prolonged distraction of a lit screen can be worse than hearing Hollaback Girl for a few seconds.
Give me my money back ' Walking out of a bomb and into the afternoon sun can be a great moment, but don't think you have to be $8 poorer. Speaking from experience, if you leave a movie before the halfway point and can defend why you walked out, march up to a manager and ask for a refund or return voucher.
Stick it to the man ' If you pay the theater to sit down for two hours, the man behind the curtain can wait a few minutes to assure the screen isn't projected disproportionately, out of focus or ' the most often-committed sin ' too dark. It's never just you ' there's always someone in the theater hoping someone will get up and say something. Be that person. 17
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Matt Burns
Moviegoing etiquette makes trip worth the money
