Most of us have never shared a bedroom with someone. Maybe a brother or a sister, but that is not the same as having a roommate (or two or three), whom you don't know, living with you in a small space for an entire year.
Some of us came to college thinking that we and our roommate(s) would become the best of friends the second we arrived. Some of us came to college and roomed with our best friends.
There are two ways that you really get to know people and see them at their worst: traveling with someone on a long road trip or living with someone. Those are the times when you see someone's flaws and magnify them to be bigger than what they really are.
There are bound to be arguments large and small. The best way to live with them is to try your hardest not to have a huge, grudge-holding argument. The most obvious thing to do to avoid causing arguments is to learn to compromise. It's like preschool all over again. You can't get everything you want, you can't always choose the TV channel and you can't always listen to your favorite music on your iHome. Alternate. Share. Be considerate.
Remember, you are not married; what's theirs is not necessarily yours. It is rude to eat all their food and it is inconsiderate to borrow their clothes. Hopefully, you made a roommate agreement like your RA told you to, and you know what things are communal, such as the television or the futon, and what things aren't.
If you didn't, you may want to do so now because there are still two quarters left, which leaves a lot of time for missing donuts and shirts. Because it's colder than last quarter, you and your roommate(s) may be spending more time in the room than before. Predict the issues and solve them before they actually occur.
You do not need to spend every moment with your roommate, though. This is how people start to get sick of their roommates. Too much time with someone you like will cause you to hate them. You do not need to eat every meal with them every day. You do not always need to take them with you to Ping to work out or to the library when you want to study. They do not have to go to every basketball game with you. Find friends who don't live in your hall, even some on a different green. That way, you have other alternatives, and when your room is getting to be too much for you, you can leave and have an alternate place to go.
Settle disputes calmly, it will make living together easier. They have no idea that hitting snooze 10 times bothers you unless you mention it in a rational way. If you start yelling, they will get defensive, leading to a bigger argument than necessary, resulting in a bad day for both of you - at only 7:15 a.m.
Don't try to control everything in your room, but don't get walked on like a doormat either. It's your room too and everyone should coexist peacefully.
Living with someone else will provide you with a new experience. Maybe you will find out that living with someone else just isn't for you. But for now, just be civil and respectful because, at the end of the day, they know where you sleep.
Mesha Baylis-Blalock is a freshman studying journalism and columnist for The Post. Tell her how you and your roommate(s) civilly resolve your disputes at mb345109@ohiou.edu.
4 Opinion
Mesha Baylis-Blalock
