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Bent on Boys: Learn to find self again after breakup

WARNING: Content may contain relatively sappy material. Proceed with caution.

The same part of our brain that reacts in response to being hurt physically also reacts when we are hurt emotionally. So have no fear, you are not entirely crazy for thinking and feeling pain because you are now broken up with someone.

It has been scientifically proven, courtesy of USA Today. You’re welcome.

It is always difficult to be broken up with and equally so to break up with someone. Regardless of the length of time the relationship lasted or whether it was a technical relationship or not, the fundamental feeling will always be a result. It is even harder to actually get over said breakup and stop looking back at what used to exist.

Though you can eventually move on, become stronger, and learn something valuable from the ending of relationships, that does not make the feelings leave. You have to not only get over the person for whom you once felt so strongly but also learn how to become yourself again.

It is important to be happy with who you are because if you cannot be so with yourself, then no one else will be able to either.

Therefore, you must take proactive measures in order to accomplish this.

After a breakup, our natural instincts are typically to wallow in self-induced pity. We want sympathy, sad movies, and more often than not, some form of binge eating to accompany these actions.

Although this might temporarily assuage our sadness, in the broader scheme of things it is ineffective.

I recommend physical activity instead of eating for the sole purpose of looking awesome post-breakup. However, I have found that both exercise and chocolate release endorphins. And endorphins make you happy. So find your preference and have at it, despite the decadence.

Find the beauty in alone time with yourself.

Do things that genuinely make you feel happy and don’t be afraid to be the person sitting alone in a dining hall, on a bench or walking around. It’s the simple things that make a difference, and taking time for you is necessary.

You can also use this newfound sense of self to improve your relationships with the other people in your life who you might be neglecting. It is unfortunate, but often inevitable that we shove our inner circle to the side when a significant other pops in our lives.

When you do decide to surround yourself with people, make sure they appreciate you and want you around for exactly who you are.

Also, use this time in your life to do something fantastic and new. Start a new hobby, join a new group or organization, get a job, anything that will allow you to submerge yourself into new relationships with your awesome fellow peers.

Don’t be afraid to try new things and work on becoming an even better version of yourself. Looking back and focusing on the negative aspects of life is easier than realizing what you have going. However, you should not neglect yourself in learning how to be you again after something as frustrating and painful as a breakup occurs.

There is no formula or designated time frame for breakups, but it’s important that you find the best method for yourself. You deserve it.

Bentley Weisel is a freshman studying magazine journalism and a columnist for The Post. How do you get your endorphins pumping? Email Bentley at bw289809@ohiou.edu.

 

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