FACEBOOK VS. TOILETS
A recent study by the London Science Museum found that more Brits would prefer to live without a flushing toilet than abandon Facebook. See, Americans aren’t as wacked on our priorities as the world thinks we are. We value a working toilet — or should I say a working loo. Letting it mellow might cut down your water bill, but it’s not a worthy trade for Facebook. What happens when the waste exceeds the high water mark? Besides, it’s just gross! Why in the world would someone compare having working pipes to having a Facebook? All I’m saying is be careful what you wish for.
— Lindsay Friedman
ELEPHANTS NEVER TO FORGET
I knew I was deeply, irrevocably in love with elephants when I watched one of those 6-ton love lumps at the Cleveland Zoo bust out into a jog. He made it across his naturalized cave in seconds, his monstrous ears flapping in the wind, without missing a step or dropping a single piece of hay clenched between his luscious lips. I stopped dead in the middle of the street and was almost flattened by a golf cart taking a group of tourists to see the monkeys. When I realized an elephant can have enough inner conviction to convince his inconceivable heft to approach 5 miles an hour, well, let’s just say the moment we shared is one that elephant will never forget.
— Rebecca McKinsey
