My boyfriend and I started dating a few months ago and have spent almost every moment together since. We’re both getting busy and are having what some might call separation anxiety. What is the appropriate amount of time for us to spend together to keep the spark alive without smothering each other?
Separation anxiety plagues many couples. We all have those mornings when you are leaving to go to class and your boyfriend holds onto your left leg begging you not to leave him. He cries and cries until you assure him that class is only an hour long and it is not that you want to leave him – it’s just that you have to, and no, he cannot come with you.
I really hope your relationship is nothing like this. If it is, please stop reading this column and go invest in birth control ASAP ... and maybe make sure he is over 18.
Being apart is good, and it’s also good that you two are missing one another. If you find yourself not wanting to see your boyfriend or girlfriend for a month or so, like what happened to Taylor Swift (she and her boyfriend are never, ever getting back together, like ever), then it’s bad. There has to be a happy medium and I think it’s somewhere between 10 and 20 yards. Luckily football season kicked off Sunday, so visualize the yardage accordingly.
There are so many different types of couples: long-distance couples, always-together couples, busy couples and so on. But take apart the “couple” and it breaks down into two people who love each other: That is where the stress begins.
College is one of the most fun, most stressful times of an individual’s life. Combining two lives is stressful as well and no matter the couple it’s often not natural. It’s all a game of give and take. As long as you are meeting your needs with class and work, then you are on solid ground. However the leftover time is spent remains up to you guys. Be together around the clock or take breathers, there exists no wrong or right outside of happiness.
But be warned: It is really annoying when couples do spend too much time together. (Quick side note: Yoko Ono and John Lennon never spent a night apart throughout their entire marriage).
But there are times when being away from the person you love is just as cool as being with her or him. Some of the best memories are not going home with a boyfriend or girlfriend but to roommates waiting with pizza and an untreated hot tub.
Relax – together or apart – because as long as the love stays strong you two cool cats will stay happy. Just keep working on your relationship without letting the rest of your life fall apart.
Steph Doan is a senior studying journalism. Looking for love advice? Shoot her your sex and relationship questions at thebedpostpeople@gmail.com.
