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Campus Counselor

Campus Counselor: Don’t disconnect from home

Olivia Hupp discusses the importance of keeping in touch with those at home.

Over the past year, I have developed the habit of calling my mother in between classes and work.  They are often shortened versions of normal conversations, squeezed into the amount of time it takes for me to walk to class or wait in the endless Chipotle line. Our talks usually last long enough for me to deliver any news I’ve been harboring or for her to update me on recent events back home. I started to see these conversations as sufficient, calling once or twice a week to keep in touch. But last night I realized they weren’t.

I called my mother as I walked uptown for dinner, lingering a couple extra minutes outside of my destination to wrap things up. I stood with one hand on the door handle, impatiently listening to her trying to condense a few pieces of last-minute thoughts. I promised her that we would talk again soon, but she was audibly disappointed, saying we haven’t talked much lately.

I hated to admit it, but she was right.

When I first came to OU, I called my parents at least three times a week and visited home every other weekend. Our phone conversations would last anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour. New things were happening every day, and being close with my parents before moving out, I couldn’t wait to share my experiences with them. I was somewhat of an atypical freshman in that respect; most people couldn’t wait to get out of the house and distance themselves from their parents, but I couldn’t shake the desire to be home.

Athens has become my home in the years since. I transitioned from the dorms to renting an apartment, becoming slightly more independent and disconnected from life in my hometown. Having a job and a heavy course load limited my weekends spent back home, which made phone calls to my parents all the more precious. But I’ve suffered the winds of change. Three times a week has turned into one and an hour has turned into a few minutes. The phone calls themselves have begun to feel like another chore on my checklist. I fear that I’m losing my sense of place.

For someone who was very connected to her home during the first year and a half of enrollment at OU, I have made a complete 180. I wonder if I spent too much time in my hometown during my freshman and sophomore years, depriving myself of the college experience early on. Perhaps I’m trying to make up for it now by completely disconnecting myself.

I do not advise this approach to life away from home. I recommend maintaining a balance. Don’t be consumed by the distance.

If you are new to OU, embrace it. Revel in your newfound freedom. Stick around on the weekends and explore everything this beautiful campus has to offer. But also remember you have four more years ahead of you. Choose a few weekends to spend at home. Many students live hours from campus, making frequent journeys unreasonable. To those students: don’t think you’re too grown up to call your parents.

They care — possibly more than you realize — and they miss you, no matter how long ago you left the nest.

Olivia Hupp is a senior studying English literature and creative writing. Email her at oh994610@ohio.edu.

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