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BedPost: Keeping sexting safe, fun

If you’re a college student or anyone who has ever used a dating app, you’re familiar with the infamous phrase “send pics.”

If you’re “lucky,” it might even be followed with a winky face or devil emoji. The pictures in question are sexy in nature, but it’s important to only do what you’re comfortable with. Sexting is defined by Planned Parenthood as “using your phone to send sexual pictures, videos, or texts,” but it can really be whatever you want it to be.

Here are some tips on how to keep things fun and safe:

If you’re just talking …

Keep it light on emojis 

Let me start by saying no emojis at all are ideal. If you absolutely can’t help yourself, it's best to stick with simple hearts and winky faces. Bonus points if you keep it even more minimal with “;)” but we all know a row of eight eggplant emojis isn’t cute. In this case, some things are better left unsaid. 

Don’t get too specific 

You’ll inevitably be let down, especially if you’re in the early stages of talking to someone and you plan on meeting up. The easiest way to avoid this is to be authentic and not try to be something you’re not. Leaving something to the imagination is best, and it makes things more fun. In this situation, less is more. 

Just because you’re talking doesn’t mean a meet-up 

Anyone has the power to ghost you, and that stings. Accepting that reality, however, can be empowering as you, too, have the power to stop talking to someone if you’re in any way uncomfortable. The golden rule of sexting is this: sexting does not equal meet-ups. This can be tough to accept if you’ve been talking to someone you’re interested in, but knowing and employing this rule can keep you safe when things get uncomfortable or unsafe.

If you’re sending pictures …

Play some music

Sexting is supposed to be fun! Whether you’re just looking to spice up your week or you’re in a long-distance relationship, music can make all the difference. Play your favorite songs to get you in that confident and sexy headspace, or look for a pre-made playlist. You and your partner could even make a collaborative playlist. Here’s a suggestion to get you started.

Wear what makes you feel the best 

Everyone has a favorite outfit. Whether that’s a full set or nothing at all, wear something that will make you feel confident, comfortable and true to yourself. That attitude will show in your pictures and just make the experience more fun for everyone involved. 

Get posing tips

TikTok has a wealth of information. If you need some inspiration, accounts like @alsadigboudoir and @belladeaboudoir offer free tips on at-home poses that keep your face out of the photo if you prefer to stay anonymous. 

If something happens …

Revenge porn is real, and the unfortunate reality is it can happen to you. In 2016, one in 25 Americans were either threatened with or victims of nonconsensual sharing of sexual images, and the number is even higher for female college students — about one in 10. High-profile women like Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton and Rihanna have been affected by the phenomenon but, still, over half of college students have sent nudes.

This is because sending explicit photos or videos isn’t the problem. As an adult, you have the authority to do whatever you want with your body, your time and your phone. The problem is the people who share intimate content because they’re angry. Luckily, as of 2019, Ohio has state law in place to take action against revenge porn. 

Violating revenge porn laws in the state can result in a variety of consequences, including third-, second- or first-degree misdemeanors. Additionally, Ohio legislature allows for those affected by revenge porn to sue and engage in civil action against the offender. 

Remember, the best tip for sexting is it’s always up to you to do what you feel comfortable with. Keep things safe, fun and, above all, legal. 

BedPost is a relationship column that does not reflect the views of The Post. 

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