I'm not one to criticize someone for his or her clothing. I couldn't care less about what you're wearing unless, of course, it happens to be a swastika armband. However, there is one cultural phenomenon that always gets to me.
Before I arrived at college, I never heard of a The North Face jacket. The very name instilled an image of a Laplander of sorts with a huge frozen beard. It wasn't until a friend of mine pointed out those three grey arches that I realized the extent to which our fair city of Athens was infected.
Like the cockroaches haunting the courthouse steps, North Face jackets seemingly spring from nowhere as soon as winter begins to settle in. At the first hint of a frosted wind, the multicolor coats swarm, filling the streets. I have often wondered who sends out the memo to let everyone know it's time to get his or her North Face on. I certainly never got one, but, then again, I was never invited to the pink polo party of spring either.
I don't want to sound like an elitist who shouts CONFORMISTS! in the middle of Court Street. Like I said, I really don't care what people wear, but I am genuinely confused as to why people wear these things. The standard jacket I found was $200 with no hood, and the prices rise higher than the Alps after that. Can they really be
that comfortable?
Maybe I'm wrong about this. Maybe these things are amazing. I've never worn one myself, but they must be enjoyable. Why else would 99 percent of the population have one?
So go ahead and wear your Denalis in all their colors. I won't think less of you, but if I give you a strange look, know I'm trying only to figure out the enigma that is The North Face.
Alexander Marietta is a junior studying journalism and a columnist/cartoonist for The Post. Send him a winter coat (seriously...please) at am310906@ohiou.edu.
Conformity can be a beautiful thing. It makes life simpler, and if there is one thing I know, it's that simple means good.
With this nugget of truth in mind, let us address the recurring problem of The North Face. I'm not trying to pull the wool (or over-priced fleece) over anybody's eyes here. Yes, North Face jackets are hideously expensive. Yes, they are rarely worn by anyone on this campus who is doing any real exploring. Yes, they have become badges of honor for spoiled college girls and boys. These items I readily admit.
However, the ubiquity of The North Face at Ohio University serves as an excellent guiding light for judging people you don't know. That's right, I said judging people you don't know. Everyone does it
every day.
With thousands upon thousands of stimuli bombarding my brain every day, anything that the common man or woman can do to make themselves more easily categorized is a big help. Thanks to every student explorer who begged mom and dad for $200 in order to stay warm as they trek from bar to bar, I'm able to neatly organize and ignore a huge part of the student body on a daily basis.
So take pride in sporting your expensive fleece, my friends. Don't let naysayers get you down with hackneyed arguments about individuality and herd instinct. Slip into that jacket and damn it, go exploring. Never stop exploring, and I'll never stop to wonder if you might be an interesting person as we cross paths.
Kent Clements is a junior studying journalism and columnist for The Post. Send him your adventure stories at kc376907@ohiou.edu.
4 Opinion
Alexander Marietta and Kent Clements
