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Bent on Boys: In the end, breaking up is hard to do

We need to talk.

I hate to do this in writing and not in person, but I simply could not bring myself to face you at a time like this.

It’s not you, it’s me.

If we have learned anything during these past nine weeks, it is that sometimes things just do not work out. It was not meant to be forever, it was simply meant to be a time in both of our lives.

You know what they say; relationships always seem to be for a season, reason or lifetime.

Clearly, ours served a seasonal if not symbiotic purpose. At least, it was good for me. I provided you with a weekly piece of insightful perspective on relationships in college (or was it insightful?).

And you gave me, well, you gave me something. It is not really coming to mind right now.

Can I get back to you on that one?

OK, good.

We were on different pages. I wanted something more than you were able to give me at this point in time. I feel like I pushed you into a corner of sorts. I knew all along that you did not want something serious.

I thought it would be OK to hope for the best, regardless of the outcome. Most people would instinctively express fear and anger when they encounter diverse opinions.

But I really do appreciate all of your tolerance and kindness toward me as I publicly worked through my pain.

All I ever really wanted was to go on a date. It’s everything I needed in life. I just wanted to be treated like a princess so you could potentially be my prince charming.

I should have said something sooner. Now things are going to be awkward when we run into each other on campus.

But do you think we can just be friends?

Actually, come to think of it, maybe we were never real friends.

I think you will always want more than I can give. It just pains me to go through with this because breakups are hard.

I only hope we are both able to become ourselves again when it is all over.

After all, we were just two people who could easily be lumped into one of four stereotypes moving through the motions that college had to offer us.

Life really is that simple.

I think part of the blame can be attributed to the time and energy invested in your bromance.

You were not putting me first and I could not handle it anymore. Like I said, this essentially happened because of me, not you.

But if we are laying everything out on the table regarding our fidelities and alliances, you were not exactly on my front-burner.

It’s not that I wasn’t into you. I simply wanted to keep my other options open. I find it foolish to put all of my eggs in one basket.

I will always treasure what you were able to bring to the table though. That is the truth.

Just don’t get the wrong idea. I know it seems that I have left a slight sliver of hope for us, but I really am stringing you along just enough to keep you at my discretion.

I have too many ghosts from my relationships past. They are haunting me. I cannot let go. I am paralyzed with preventative fear of such a thing recurring.

And one more thing, I just remembered what you gave me. You read me, you really read me.

P.S. I already changed my Facebook status …

Bentley Weisel is a freshman studying magazine journalism and a columnist for The Post. Make up after the break up? Email Bentley at bw289809@ohiou.edu.

 

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