I’ve never understood the allure of theater. Why would someone spend $100 to see a play with a production value of several thousand dollars when they could see a movie for $10 with a production value of millions? Is theater cultured? Broadway ran the Spiderman musical, and that is many things, but it sure isn’t cultured.
This weekend, I decided to go see a play being performed by the School of Theater at Kantner Hall called Mr. Marmalade. I chose to go because the performance was free for students. I also wanted to go because the plot synopsis explained that the play would include an abusive imaginary friend, talking plants and a suicidal 5-year-old. Awesome! Is this a play or the true story of Keith Richards?
I’ve been alive now for 21 years, and I have seen my share of weirdness. However, this play had to be one of the weirdest things I have ever seen in my life. The entire play took place in a living room, and it followed the story of Lucy, a 4-year-old with the imagination of a 40-year-old living a life out of a Lifetime movie.
Lucy lives in a broken home with a single parent, probably somewhere in New Jersey. That is not a rip on the state (OK, maybe a little), only that some of the accents of the characters come straight out of Jersey Shore. Also, the oversexed babysitter is named Sookie.
On top of her life, Lucy has an imaginary friend called Mr. Marmalade. I really underestimated this play coming in, because when I heard Mr. Marmalade, I was expecting a Cat in the Hat-like figure. Instead, I got a guy who looks like a cross between Will Smith in Men in Black and Gustavo Fring from Breaking Bad.
Lucy is in an odd relationship with Mr. Marmalade. Mr. Marmalade is always busy with work, and Lucy is feeling neglected. Lucy would later find solace in the arms of 5-year-old Larry. Out of all the characters, I liked Larry the most.
I give Greg Atkin, the guy who played Larry, a lot of credit for some of the stuff he had to do. That included being stripped half-naked as well as practically receiving a hand job onstage by a girl acting as a 4-year-old during a session of “doctor” with Lucy.
Wait a second...Lucy played doctor with Larry when she was already in a relationship with her imaginary friend? That tramp!
I won’t go into details about the show, but after being introduced to the abusive side of Mr. Marmalade and sexually active toddlers, I thought I finally managed to adapt to the weirdness of this show. Then the show introduced two talking plants. At this point, I was stunned by what I was watching and realized I shouldn’t even try to keep up with the weird, but just sit back and enjoy it.
The play was promoted as a “dark comedy,” but I guess my comedy is naturally dark, because I found the entire show hysterical. It was common for there to be a dark scene taking place, and I would just laugh at the absurdity of the situation.
When Mr. Marmalade hit Lucy, I perfectly timed my laughter to the gasps with the rest of the audience. Again, when Larry said he was suicidal, the entire place was quiet except for my loud giggles.
After all my talk about the absurd characters, it may sound like I disliked the show, but I actually adored it. The show was absolutely priceless, genuinely funny, and it was one of the most original things I’ve ever seen. The acting was pretty good too, though it is hard to get a read on the acting when you are near the back. Again, if this were a movie, I wouldn’t have that issue.
I know there are a lot of people like me out there who don’t like theater, so let me give a suggestion to Broadway: Add more insane toddlers and violent imaginary friends. Thanks.
Dennis Fulton is a senior studying journalism at Ohio University and a columnist for The Post. What should he try next? Email him at df342709@ohiou.edu.
