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BedPost: Trust should trump temptations for couples spending winter break apart

Dear BedPost,

How do you maintain a long-term relationship? I’m really nervous my boyfriend is going to cheat on me during break and I want to try to keep things interesting so he won’t, but is it really possible to maintain a relationship with someone you don’t see?

Dear reader,

I find that making all of my lovers stay with me simply requires a few DIY tips from my Pinterest board. Perhaps a bedazzled chain? A papier-mâché box to keep all of the blackmail you have on him?

Maintaining a long-distance relationship is difficult. Sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder, and other times, it makes both parties fonder for someone who will listen and lots of chocolate ice cream (not that I would know).

The basis of any relationship is trust. If you don’t have trust, you don’t have anything, especially in a long-distance relationship. If you’re this worried about a significant other cheating on you, then why be with him? There is no reason why you shouldn’t be with someone who is genuinely excited and thrilled to be with you — and only you. Christmas break is for visions of sugarplums in your head, not adultery.

Kristin is a junior studying journalism and culture editor of The Post.

I’m going to level with you, nameless questioner: long-term relationships are hard to keep up with, especially once distance becomes a factor.

The distance you’re about to experience, however, will only last about a month, so that’s not nearly as bad as it could be. From the sound of things, the two of you both attend this university and therefore spend more time out of the year in the same town than not.

That said, this all begs the question of why you’re nervous about your beau fooling around with some tail behind your back in his hometown over just a few weeks.

This has to be a guy you can trust to go see his old friends if you want a relationship to work at all, much less over a long period of time.

You even said “really nervous,” qualifying your situation as more than just standard worry. This is disconcerting.

Now, unless you’re exaggerating the scenario for the sake of our educational column, that unease isn’t a super healthy thing to have hanging over your head.

I’d suggest taking a good look at your relationship.

Good luck and happy holidays!

Ian is a junior studying journalism. Have romantic trouble over the looming break? Email us at


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