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BedPost: The power trip of giving a blowjob

Unlike most people, I love giving blowjobs. 

No, I don’t love the look and feel of a penis. No, I don’t love the “will they? won’t they?” cum in my mouth. I do, however, love how sexy I feel giving one. 

I have a dominant presence in life, but I like being submissive in the bedroom. The best doms can act like a sub when the time comes and drive their partner insane. 

Having a partner moan your name, pull your hair and have a genuine craving for you makes me feel confident during sex. It makes me feel hot. Do I need a man’s approval to make me feel good about myself? No, but it sure does make for some good foreplay. 

I am going to be blunt. I know I’m good at sex, but I wasn’t always. 

When performing a sexual act, including a blowjob, the key is confidence. Even if the idea of a penis freaks you out, your partner will love the confidence you display and make sex that much better. 

For example, eye contact with your partner is huge. Not giving eye contact is a sign of shyness in real life, just like it is in sex. You don’t need to death-stare them, but a sexy smirk with their penis in your mouth puts the hottest image in their brain. 

Another tip is to not overthink. For years, I would strategically plan teeth placement, tongue swirling, breathing and how to not awkwardly take breaks. Sexual partners do not care about that. Don’t be afraid to get a little loud and dirty about it, especially when it comes to slurping sounds. Overthinking it just ruins the fun. 

Sexy tricks can especially get you and your partner excited about giving a blowjob. It can be especially satisfying knowing your partner is turned on by what you’re doing, and hearing them moan your name is just the cherry on top of the sexual sundae.

Here is my go-to: when you are making out with your partner and things are starting to get frisky, pull away and ask them to get an ice cube. They will be immediately intrigued. When they come back, lay them down and run the ice down their body, starting at their lips and ending just before the penis. Lick the melted ice all the way, and put the cube in your mouth as you start the blowjob. Keep the cube in one side of your mouth and suck and move around as you go. 

There are many little tricks you can follow. PornHub and Reddit exist for a reason. No matter what, though, it is the way you act on your partner that truly makes them go wild. Your sexual aura will shine through in the bedroom and make your partner feel that much better. 

I get my power trip through confidence. I know I’m the best at what I do, and that is conveyed to my partner. If you still don’t feel it, fake it 'til you make it … except for orgasms, but that’s for another article. 

BedPost is a relationship column that does not reflect the views of The Post.

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