Seeking anonymous in-person sex is nothing new to the digital age: from Craigslist solicitation to Grindr, hookup culture and sex norms are constantly evolving. For those navigating a fear of rejection and fear of being single, the anonymous app YikYak offers avenues for physical intimacy.
The app allows for college-aged students and older to post and chat in real time with their peers anonymously. Students take liberty within the anonymous app to post party fliers, vent about their feelings or even seek out sexual encounters. Individuals on YikYak can seek these types of encounters by simply posting “yookup?” If there's no engagement on your yookup-seeking post, nobody knows it was you.
YikYak removes the pretenses usually found on dating apps. You aren’t publicly sharing any identifying factors like your name, age or pictures of yourself. You can enter into a private chat unaware of who’s on the other side.
Thomas Vander Ven, a sociology professor at Ohio University, recognizes the cycle of shame and sexual behavior.
"It’s interesting because it seems to me, the social appraisal of someone seeking intimacy, being judged and shamed for that, is the very thing that drives people into these anonymous posts," Vander Ven said.
His observations of sexual behavior extend beyond social media and hookups. Vander Ven’s current research examines the motivations behind women reading erotic literature, also known as “smut.” Of nearly 190 respondents to his research, at least half of the participants agreed with the statement, “Sometimes it's just easier to read smut than to pursue a real relationship."
By avoiding in-person rejection, individuals seeking hookups exchange emotional risks for physical ones because of the barrier of remaining strictly online. This anonymity, however, can subject individuals to targeted sexual violence, a risk for members of the LGBTQIA+ community, who already face elevated rates of violence.
To better understand the true experiences behind yookups, I posted on YikYak asking individuals who have engaged in yookups to direct message me to answer a few questions about their experience. Two anonymous users messaged me on the app: a 20-year-old bisexual woman and a 22-year-old queer man.
The 20-year-old bisexual woman didn’t intentionally seek out intimacy. What began as a post to vent, a guy ended up messaging her, leading to a movie night and later hooking up.
"I was just looking for friendship," the user wrote. “But then we hung out and watched a movie, so it just escalated from there and I was down for it."
She said this ended up turning into a friends-with-benefits situation.
"Usually I have terrible hookup experiences," she wrote. “So I was surprised YikYak connected me with someone I have similar interests in and actually like."
The second respondent had a different interaction. A 22-year-old queer man explained he typically uses Grindr for hookups.
“It’s more straightforward,” he wrote. He said his one-time hookup from the app was fine because he didn’t have expectations going into it. “Although I do feel a little shame about the hookup because of the stigma with this app and sex."
Both individuals had consensual hookup experiences. One with surprise at YikYak’s abilities, and one carrying forward shame. This isn’t shocking. If you read the comments under any sex-seeking post, there are numerous comments further extending shaming or mocking the original post, encouraging them to “touch grass” or “just admit you don't know ball.”
Janie Brauley, a freshman studying special education, said she sees yookup seeking posts every time she checks the app, which is once a day. Although Brauley met her current partner online, she personally wouldn’t utilize YikYak to pursue an anonymous hookup. She said she has seen the pile-on of trolling on the platform.
Brauley said people are uncomfortable with the idea of hooking up with strangers they met online, leading them to post negative comments on yookup seeking posts. Brauley said users who post hateful comments often "... use humor as a coping mechanism." When asked about potential motivations for anonymous hookups, she pointed to a fear of judgment from peers, as a dating app profile could appear online, but with YikYak, an identity is hidden.
Regardless of the platform, whether an app exclusive to dating or for anonymity for college-aged people, intimacy feels safer with lower stakes.
Before you troll underneath that yookup-seeking post, understand you are taking an active role in reinforcing shameful narratives and you might end up seeing a lot more of them as people discover an alternative avenue to pursue intimacy.
Alexa Sanders is a junior studying psychology at Ohio University. Please note the opinions expressed in this column do not represent those of The Post. Want to talk to Alexa about her column? Email her at al683822@ohio.edu
