Miss Piggy tries karma on for size as she helps Kermit buy a birthday present for his girlfriend Denise.
Six episodes in, The Muppets walk the fine line between depressing nonsense and aimless fun. This is the second time the show has given us the kind of fun only the Muppets can have — the type that has no point but is clever. We don’t have to worry about the plot and whether it’s a waste of time.
The Muppets accomplished some major goals with Kristin Chenoweth guest starring: she sang “I Could Have Danced All Night,” got fantasized by Statler and Waldorf and went on a road trip with Dr. Teeth and The Electric Mayhem.
“The Ex-Factor” had Miss Piggy and Chenoweth on stage rehearsing. Chenoweth mentions it’s the first time she has seen Piggy since her breakup with Kermit. Piggy tries to pass it off as if she broke up with Kermit, but Chenoweth wasn’t fooled by the “real” video of Kermit breaking up with Piggy. Despite the two of them being friends, Piggy makes the comeback of Chenoweth being on Broadway and asks how much of that was actually “real.” The comeback didn’t make much sense at all, but Piggy still brought the sass.
In the audience, Statler says Chenoweth is a looker and asks Waldorf if he’s too old for her. Waldorf’s response is, “You’re cold?” and by Waldorf’s lack of hearing he realized he was indeed too old, and added that yes he was cold.
Denise shows up to the set and it’s the first time she's appeared since the pilot. She freaks out that a nerd like her just can’t get over her love for Kristin Chenoweth and that she is her No. 1 fan. Uncle Deadly, Piggy’s seamster, says he owns the domain name chenowethfannumber1.com so he actually trumps her as being the biggest fan. I don't know exactly what Uncle Deadly is supposed to be, but all we know is he's creepy and a tailor.
Denise says she will absolutely die if Kermit doesn’t introduce her to Chenoweth, which puts Kermit in a tight position having Denise be in the same room as his ex-girlfriend, the star of the show. He waves off the introduction saying Chenoweth is busy even though she and Piggy are just standing around talking. Believing Kermit, Denise walks away, but then sporadically runs toward the stage screaming “YOLO.” It was incredibly funny and made me forget how weird Denise looks as a Muppet.
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Denise starts babbling to Chenoweth and because there isn’t a rude bone in Chenoweth’s body, she’s holding onto every rambling word Denise says. Kermit takes her away as Chenoweth realizes that was just Kermit’s girlfriend.
On the show Piggy and Chenoweth decide to sing and end up singing a song from My Fair Lady, and I cry every time Chenoweth hits those high notes.
Offset, Kermit’s secretary Yolanda made reservations for Denise’s birthday and asks Kermit what he got her. He tells Yolanda that Denise said she didn’t want a gift and Yolanda laughs in his face for being that stupid. Kermit says he’s in trouble because he is a terrible gift-giver.
After the show, Chenoweth is stopped by The Electric Mayhem and asks her in a drugged out way to come on the road with them to play Floyd’s parents’ 40th anniversary party. She agrees, and I rejoice because nothing good can come out of this. It’ll be great.
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Kermit turns to the writers Pepe the King Prawn, Rizzo the Rat and Gonzo (and Chip the I.T. guy who still shouldn’t exist) for gift ideas. All they did was solidify that Kermit is royally screwed in trying to find a gift for Denise by tomorrow.
Desperate, Kermit tags along with Scooter to this pottery place to make a handmade gift for Denise, but it ends up looking like a third grader scribbled on a salad plate.
Kermit isn’t even desperate anymore; he’s hopeless. He turns to Piggy who is the gift giving guru — she gave a GoPro Queen Elizabeth II. Piggy agrees to help but wants immunity to ask personal questions about Denise to “get to know her.” All she finds out is that Denise is obsessed with ketchup and football, is disorganized and likes the outdoors and black-and-white photos. It sounds like an Instagram bio from any one of the thousands of white girls. Piggy “awes” Kermit saying it’s like he’s dating her 6-year-old niece, but then is confused as to why the two of them don’t have a song to share together just as she and Kermit did.
They head out to go shopping and Yolanda stops them for a meeting Kermit has to go to with the network president in 10 minutes, leaving Piggy to pick out the gift by herself. This is just too easy for Piggy. She’s sneaky and sophisticated with this opportunity, and it’s too hard to pinpoint what she will do.
Kermit is as at the sushi restaurant with Denise panicking because Piggy is not there with the gift. He stalls by eating an entire boat of sushi and sings a 52-verse intro to “Happy Birthday.” When Piggy finally arrives, she brings Kermit a jewelry box made out of Georgia’s state tree — where Denise is from. Piggy says a disorganized girl who likes football is too tough to admit she needs a jewelry box. There’s also a charm bracelet with a little silver ketchup bottle.
Denise loves it and sees there’s a switch on the inside of the box. The switch plays the song that Piggy and Kermit had such a strong connection to.
Piggy subtly says to the camera that she would do anything for Kermit, but under no circumstances do you ask your ex to buy a gift for your girlfriend.
Cut to The Electric Mayhem road tripping through the desert with Chenoweth, and it’s the greatest thing ever. She’s concerned that her seatbelt is a guitar strap connected to nothing. Animal offers her Funyuns, saying they're "fun like chip, crunchy-like onion." We are told Floyd’s parent’s don’t live in a house, but a hole out in the desert that Floyd’s dad ran an old school bus into. It’s perfect.
Floyd has his arm around Janice and to make conversation, Chenoweth asks how long they have been together. Janice retorts she’s not anyone's lady, which Floyd then gets upset about saying he shut down his Tinder for her. Dr. Teeth admits Janice used to be his lady awhile ago but didn’t think it was important to tell Floyd about his “romantic excursions.”
They continue fighting with the van pulled over and Chenoweth tries to wave this as a simple communication problem and they all need to have a fresh start. The band all gangs up on her saying they never had these problems until she came along, so THEY LEAVE CHENOWETH STRANDED IN THE DESERT WITH NOTHING BUT A BAG OF FUNYUNS.
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For once, the episode wasn't bogged down with Piggy's emotions or trivial drama. Piggy was cunning, and The Electric Mayhem killed it with every line and spaced out joke. On top of that was Queen Chenoweth, who brightens any show with her pink dresses and operatic scream.
Muppet MVP: Miss Piggy, for killing Kermit with kindness.
Rating: 4/5
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