What's the first thing you do when you begin to watch a sporting event on television?
One might think to gather his or her beverages and snacks before creating a comfortable groove in the coach.
Not me.
Before I set down the remote, I make sure to click the mute button.
I know if I don't, I'll be forced to listen to moronic color commentators list off thesaurus heavy analogies and clichéd nicknames created by the likes of Brent Musburger and Bill Raftery.
Along with these annoyances come others that have made watching basketball and many other games audibly painful.
Some examples of these are the court and crowd microphones. There is no reason for a viewer to need to know what athletes are saying during the game. Half the time all you hear is curse words or unintelligible complaints to the referees.
Now maybe if Allen Iverson and Paul Pierce were in a thorough debate over what percent milk does the body better, I'd be interested (I like hearing pointless arguments, especially among some of the most competitive people on the planet).
Second, why would anyone want to have the crowds miked? Is it really that necessary to hear audiences cheer and chant loud enough to overpower the play-by-play? I assume it was designed to make you feel like you were at the game, but come on. Hearing the equivalent to white noise throughout the entire game doesn't enhance my viewing experience.
My third and final complaint about mics is the use of rim and backboard microphones. Nothing increases my viewing pleasure more than hearing the obnoxious ping and thunk of a nice brick bouncing off the rim.
So back to the masters of the art of commentary.
I'm sick of being worn out, and tired of hearing before mentioned color commentators pollute the air waves with what they think are witty comments about certain plays and players. Shut up and do your job of analyzing possessions and filling in for the play-by-play person when need be, instead of telling absurd anecdotes about player's distant family members you've talked to.
Musburger's hi-jinks have gone so far as to spur drinking games created by his fans that have warnings of getting you smashed eight minutes into the game. I'm currently designing a game based off Raftery's trademark quips like with a kiss and send it in.
So until these growing annoyances go away there will be many more games watched on mute.
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Nick Miller
